An Excerpt – Planet Fran

When my day working in Sheffield was done, I was running about half an hour late and that meant that the traffic was likely to be horridly busy. I could see out of the window that it was raining heavily as I was packing up ready to leave the training site to head back to my car. Always without one, Paul had bought me a compact umbrella as a stocking filler for Christmas last year. I put it in my car boot for emergencies. And there it remains, neither use nor ornament in this heavy rain. I wrapped up well in my coat and scarf. As an afterthought, I took my glasses off their usual pew on top of my head and tucked them safely in my coat pocket. When I say the rain was heavy, I mean horizontal, sheet rain of the sort that makes you feel like you just stepped out of a shower. So, it’s not rocket science to guess that I got wet. So wet was I, I stripped off my coat and scarf and threw them along with my laptop and handbag into the boot of my car before quickly jumping in the driver’s seat, thankful to be out of the rain.

I got going quickly, as I could see queues already building. Once in the flow of traffic, I felt I could relax a little. All being well, I’d be at the yard to sort Batman by about six-thirty and I might catch Sue for a quick brew, too. As I drew to a standstill at the first traffic lights, I thought I’d just use my Sat Nav to check the best route back to avoid the worst of the traffic. That was where I realised my oversight. My phone, with my maps app, was sitting happily on the passenger seat, next to me. My glasses, however, were tucked into my soaking wet coat in the boot. Given that at close range I can see sweet sod all in any sort of useful detail without my glasses, I was, to put it bluntly, screwed!

Not to worry, I told myself, how many times have I used the keyboard on my iPhone? (That was rhetorical – I knew exactly how many times, well not exactly, what I mean is, I knew I’d used it lots) I decided I could put the postcode in anyway as I could make out the keys. After doing so, I pressed the large green Go button. Big mistake – BIG mistake. DN13 6RG became DN14 6EG. The difference might only be two alpha-numeric characters, but the actual difference sits around the twelve-mile mark. I might have realised my mistake, if I had any remote semblance of a sense of direction but, alas, that’s a department (along with many others) that I am liberally under-blessed in.

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